52% intelligent. 9% modest. More monkey than bear.
Thursday, 19 January 2012
but now and then we wonder who the real men are....
I reckon there's a gap in the market for a proper handbook for men; a MANual, if you will....
I'm 37 years old and you would imagine that I would be getting the hang of things by now, but this simply isn't true. Apart from anything else, growing this beard has been a voyage of discovery for me pretty much right from the start.
- Why does no one tell you the point at which stubble stops and a beard starts?
- Why has it come out less grey than the rest of the hair on my head?
- To trim or not to trim?
- What do you trim with? How short? How often?
- How far down your throat should you let it grow?
- What about the stubble that grows high up on your cheek bones?
- How long should I expect it to be itchy for?
- What strategies are there to avoid stroking or pulling it all the time?
- Why should growing one be so fascinating to other people?
- What's the etiquette around letting people touch it?
- Beard envy from other guys. What's that all about?
- Should people not be forewarned about how weird it feels on your pillow?
- Is this actually going to keep my face warmer on the ski slopes?
...and so on.
Every day that I keep this thing, new questions keep popping into my head. I'm hardly the first man to go through this, and I surely can't be the only one to wonder about these and other important questions of beard etiquette.
Or does this handbook for men already exist and I've just missed it?
Or is it passed down, word-of-mouth, from generation to generation? Did my father neglect to pass this information down to me, or is the knowledge slowly being lost to us men as we lead ever more urban and metrosexual lives where more attention is paid to styling mousse than to basic beard growth and maintenance?