At the supermarket this week, I tried to liven up my mundane life by changing my breakfast cereal of choice. Now, normally of a morning, I like to have a sesame seed bagel with some marmalade or golden syrup or something lightly spread across the top. I do like my bread, after all. On some mornings though, I just hanker after something different.
It is for mornings like those that I keep a box of cereal in my kitchen cupboard. Yeah. That's how I roll. I've tried various sorts, but my default cereal of choice is Crunchy Nut Cornflakes. I find their advertising tedious in the extreme, but I like a cereal sweet enough without being entirely infantile or smothered in chocolate.
Anyway. I wanted a change. After a few seconds of consideration, I picked up a box of original Alpen and popped it into the trolley.
Living the dream.
In some ways, it's a nostalgic choice. We used to have this at home when I was growing up and it's a very aspirational cereal from the 1980s. It's worthy enough, up to a point, but it's not quite in the same category as some of those newer, pricier mueslis and granolas that look like unsweetened bird food - never mind the fact that anyone who has any kind of middle class pretension is mixing their own granola nowadays. Yeah. It might be naff, but I've never been a dedicated follower of breakfast cereal trends, so Alpen would certainly do for those mornings when I don't fancy a bagel.
It would do just fine.
My wife wasn't so sure:
"Why have you picked Alpen?"
"I like Alpen"
"But it's a woman's cereal"
"What? Why would you say something like that? How exactly is Alpen a woman's cereal?"
"They sponsor 'Grey's Anatomy' on the telly"
I bought it, but such is my disapproval of their televisual sponsorship choices that it tastes like ashes in my mouth.
A man I hate
13 hours ago