Once in a while, I like to take the dusty path through the stats for this site.
I've been doing this for long enough now (a little over 9 years, would you believe) that I've long since reconciled myself to the fact that I'm never likely to get a book deal out of my blogging and I don't tend to obsess over my visitor numbers.
I write for me, man....which, looking at the data, is probably just as well.
That said, I never fail to be entertained by the search terms that bring people to this humble corner of the Internet.
My current favourite? "Do beards smell?"
Well, in the hopes of perhaps increasing my readership, I'll take this one.
Are you ready for this?
OK. Do beards smell? Well, I can't claim to speak on behalf of all beards - indeed, I shaved mine off in December, so perhaps I shouldn't really be speaking on behalf of *any* beards - but mine didn't smell.
Well, I don't think it did.... perhaps lightly of Sex Panther (60% of the time, it works every time...). Other than that, largely odourless.
There. That's it. Happy to help.
Good luck with your enquiries, random passing stranger from the world wide web. If you have any further questions, please feel free to swing back any time.
That's me: mass appeal blogging since March 2nd 2004. Any interested literary agents can contact me via the email in my profile.