Tuesday 5 August 2008

let's talk about sex....

I received a brilliant email yesterday. It looked as though it had been addressed to me personally, but I imagine it's been sent to hundreds if not thousands of people. Hell, you might have it. You should check your inbox -- it's definitely worth a look.

It's from someone glorying in the name of Dr. Tuppy Owens, and it's a press release for the "Erotic Awards Showcase & Ball".

Sounds promising already, right? And that's even before you get to the quote from Grayson Perry saying that the event is
“The Glastonbury of sex – these are the good people in a gloriously mucky Business". Wow. Grayson Perry, Turner Prize winning artist and cross-dresser said that? Maybe this is worth a closer look, eh?

Well, a quick perusal of the press release reveals that:

"Fundraising The Night of the Senses (now in it's 22nd year) and the Erotic Awards are the main fundraisers for the Outsiders Trust, a charity set up by Dr Tuppy Owens in 1979 for disabled people to enjoy sexual pleasure and form relationships."

Cool. Apparently, "The night begins with the announcement of the winners, who are presented with Golden Flying Penis Trophies which have been hand carved in Bali."

Hand carved Golden Flying Penis Trophies from Bali? Sounds brilliant. Apparently the award ceremony is then followed by the performances onstage: "fashion shows, performance art and striptease, a hot show that warms up our guests so they spill out merrily into the maze of pleasure palaces. Every taste is catered for: the Sensuality Chamber where couples make love serenaded by musicians, the Roissy Dungeon, the Infinity Dome, Golden Pond, Massage Garden, Boys' Back Room, Women's Womb, Café Shebeen and Grope Box."

My absolute favourite bit though is the announcement of the guests. Amongst the various artists, academics and international film makers, we have:

"Sue Newsome, Tantric sex worker from the West Country"

I don't know where to begin with that, really: the distractingly normal-sounding name that could (and perhaps does) belong to a jam-making pillar of the community; the fact that she's not just a sex worker, but a tantric sex worker; the fact that she's from that infamous den of iniquity in the West Country.....

This looks real enough, but I don't really know if this has been sent to me genuinely (but a little mystifyingly) as a press release or if it's simply a mailing that my spam filter has missed.... what I do know is that it made me smile and it's a whole lot better than the vast majority of the crap that I get sent offering me "v1agr@", or promising an appendage that "even lions will fear" or asking me to enter the personal security details for a bank I don't even have any accounts with.

If it's real, then I salute you and the cause you are upholding. If anyone reading this is interested in finding out more, then they should check out (at their own risk and presumably NSFW):

www.erotic-awards.co.uk (check out some of the acts in their showcase)

and apparently they have a presence on Facebook and MySpace.

A quick look at the websites and it looks like a proper event to me, and the more I think about it, the more pleased I am that it exists. Good luck to them. I'd buy a kiss off Mat Fraser, wouldn't you?

....I am curious about Sue Newsome, Tantric Sex Worker from the West Country though. I can't get her out of my head. She sounds like fun.


  1. Do you think Sue Newsome charges by the hour?

  2. Tantric sex aint all that.

    In fact, it's bloody ahrd work.

    Just sayin'...

  3. have you tried it the west country way?

    just askin'....

  4. Tuppy Owens is is a real person. I read about her once in an... Er... specialist magazine.

  5. OMG it looks like a blast! If I were able for it I might consider going! (Baby due in 18 days = only fit to roll between sofa and kitchen, LOL)